Monday, August 24, 2009
Black Women Are Helpmates (If We Choose) Never Doormats!
Race DOES NOT relegate black women to expect less (than any other race of woman) in life!
If you look at some of the articles and blogs here, here and here you would think that we should. (HT to One Chele @ Black 'n Bougie) The black woman's image and character has been so tragically maligned since slavery that a majority of the world feels as if it has the right to label black women as 'less than' so therefore we should want and expect less. What??? I say HELL NO!
Ironically, all women suffer from the same patriarchal 'women are here for our pleasure' society but black women are the most brutalized by it. We have our character assassinated and our bodies objectified and critiqued (by a European standard) on a daily basis in both mainstream society and by black men. This type of treatment is only meant to create insecurity and vulnerability thus making us pliable to ensure culpability with any disrespectful agenda that the mainstream and obviously even some black men dictate. Our varied skin color(s) adds an extra level to the degradation that is inflicted upon us by both society and ourselves. Wouldn't the plantation owners be proud?
This world operates on the premise that men should control everything and therefore they have been allowed to set the standards of what is apropos when it comes to the way women are treated in society. Too many black men believe that black women are just for them to do with as they please and it has destroyed the relationship between black men and black women. In this world, the way the women in a racial group are treated by it's men undoubtedly affects the way that another racial group treats and views them. This is NOT a male bashing post and no I don't think that all men subscribe to this behavior but these are dire times so even one is too many. There is no way in hell that the mainstream would continue treating black women with such contempt and disrespect if black men stood alongside black woman and said enough and started leading by example.
Families being destroyed during slavery created households headed by women that were left with no choice but to find a way to make it in spite of the circumstances. That dynamic generated a strength that has endured in the black culture and no black woman should be ashamed of it. Strength has allowed us to encourage perseverance while enduring the hardships. An education allows all of us the opportunity for better lives and self and black women are no different. Black women want what any woman would want if we choose to share our life with a man--love, family, security and respect. A level of expectation means that you are not willing to accept less than what you think you deserve and there is not a damn thing wrong with black women having that.
Black women and black men need to figure out a way to come together and rebuild a relationship of respect that is rock solid and untouchable. What do you'll think?